I’ve been planning a Let’s play of Aurora 4x for years now. So naturally I needed to throw together a trailer. So here it is. It turned out to be a fairly decent piece of writing and a challenge to someone who’s never done any sort of video recording or editing.
It’s not great but it’s a first step.
The future looked bright.
We thought nothing could stop us.
We were wrong.
The Year was 2021
The year everything changed.
Humanity’s Golden Age was stolen from us.
Crushed stillborn in the womb.
The Face-Eating Giant Space Spiders had come. They were not our friends.
They attacked without warning. Without mercy.
Their technology was beyond comprehension.
We stood no chance against them.
Great swaths of humanity were mowed down.
Countless cities reduced to rubble.
Nations shattered beyond repair.
and then They moved on, perhaps to seek other prey.
The wormhole closed behind them.
By the slimmest of margins humanity had lived to see another day.
But humanity would be forever changed.
A great turning had began.
The Unification War of 2023-4 was shift and savage but ultimately necessary
Humanity would stand together against a cold cruel universe.
The year is now 2025. A new Government has formed under Emperor Donald II.
Humanity is one. At least for the moment. The Old Nations are all but destroyed.
Only the memories remain.
But those memories will be honored.
Billions have died.
Billions must still be avenged.
And for this we turn to our God and our Emperor.
With a single will Humanity shall face the terrors of the void.
And united we shall laugh in the face of death.
For we know that death is coming.
Let us greet it with a smile.
Great and terrible are our Enemies.
Vast is the cold dark expanse of the Void.
We have only a few Orion-drive ships and our technology seems pitiful in the face of the recent onslaught.
The odds are not in our favor.
Yet we must go.
For Humans are nothing if not determined.
We have crossed oceans in ships made of sticks and twine.
We went to the moon on a giant aluminum tube of liquid explosives and a prayer.
This is but one more challenge to overcome.
Long have we practised the brutal arts of war against our follow man.
But now we stand united as brothers and we shall put what we learnt to a righteous cause.
We shall rise from the ashes of our Homeworld.
We shall seize that which is rightfully ours.
We shall spread the Glory of the Infinite God across the Endless Sky.
And We shall strike down our foes with a righteous fury.
For who are we?
We are the Killer Monkeys From Planet Earth.
We are the Sons of Adam
We are the Enemies Most Relentless
We are the Emperor’s Chosen
and we shall prevail!
There can be no peace between Man and Spider.
Be we do not fear.
For if God be with us, then what can stand against us?
We are the Crusader States of Terra.
And we are going to Deus Vult the fuck out of everything!
Here’s a short fifteen minute documentary on Charles “The Hammer” Martel done by Real Crusades History.
As interesting as Charles himself was, the legacy of his sons only adds to his stature. Between Charles and his son Carloman we are left with the classic image of the medieval paladin king. Strong in battle, yet faithful to the church and wise in learning.
Also worthy of note was just how deep into France the Muslim invaders got. This was no mere Spanish border clash as I had once assumed. The Battle of Tours took place in the very heartland of the Frankish kingdom.
Anyway. I just figured I’d relay this for anyone wanting to catch up quickly on the inspiration for Alt-Hero’s Michael Martel.
From cheesy internet forum joke to 100% American badass in twelve easy steps.
Arkhaven Comics has just released the second issue of Alt*Hero; this time following the American vigilante story and featuring the Rebel and Hammer characters that were central in the original trailer video.
This one definitely went in a different direction than I was expecting. While a certain level of dark grittiness was inevitable, shit got real very fast here.
It was also good to see that Rebel and Mike Hammer are actual multi-dimensional characters here when it would have been so easy to turn them into lazy stereotypes.
Overall while I liked Alt*Hero #1 Crackdown I couldn’t really get excited for it. I could see the European Storyline being set up for future issues and the comic was overall surprisingly funnier than I expected. In baseball terms issue #1 was a lead off single.
Issue #2 however was a RBI double, bringing home the baserunner and the bacon. Much faster pace and higher immediate stakes for the viewpoint characters. An element of humor remains however, as seen in the offhand some of the rebel superheroes are introduced to us.
Overall a clear step forward for Arkhaven and a bit of fun for the rest of us.
Looking forward to seeing the online hatescreeches… which just makes the whole fan experience ever better.
Still autistically spending hours fiddling around with MegaMek/MekHQ. While I still really suck at the actual giant stompy robot battles I’ve at least gotten the interface figured out.
This is one hell of a piece of software. The BattleTech Fan community has actually gotten MekHQ to the point where it is possible to play a mercenary campaign strictly against the AI and the evils of the random number generator. You do occasionally have to go into GMmode and intervene but it’s amazing how far they have already gotten.
However on the flip side there is a strange peculiar fun to be had playing a very low level campaign as a scavenger group, an outlaw clan, a group of wannabe pirates or even a petty noble house. Perverse pleasure is to be found not just in embracing the giant death robots of legend but also but fighting for scraps in their shadow.
You have to do everything manually but it is possible to abuse this engine designed solely to express the glory and honor of enormous titans pf high technology doing righteous battle against implacable foes.
You can instead retreat to the realm where squads of infantry and a handful of low-end vehicles duke it out (usually at point blank machine gun range) for prizes so petty most mechwarriors won’t ever get out of their cockpits to pick it up.
What can I say? It’s a strange solo RPG experience.
But it leads to some very memorable moments.
For example I had the case of an old venerable armored truck, that was over the course of about a half battles repeatedly shot to pieces, and then repaired (if not rebuilt) only to be shot to pieces again in the next battle.
This armored truck only had a single machine gun, which wasn’t even on a turret. Still I had to keep using it as I couldn’t afford anything better. However it slowly dawned on me that the truck was indeed doing its job as every bullet shot at it was one less attack on my other more vulnerable units.
Thus the truck has been dubbed Bulletsponge Steelpants.
Sadly the famed armored truck was finally completely destroyed in the very next battle, by a mechanized-hover platoon at least two of the three crew baled out.
Sorry about the delay on this one but I got sucked into a wormhole and spent most of the last couple evening messing around with MegaMek and trying (er… failing) to get the hang of it. That campaign editor is just taunting me at this point. Sadly I’m not that familiar with the Battletech Tabletop rules.
Anyway let’s begin.
How to make Warhammer Adventures NOT suck [11 mins]
Arch Warhammer outlines his modest proposal for how to go about writing a children’s story in the Warhammer 40k universe while still staying faithful to established lore.
Cody Fernandez on the Punisher, antiheroes and how the character effected him as teenager.
The video is a little dry but this might be interesting to anyone who plays Crusader Kings or is interested in medieval history. Of note is how Pope Urban II seemed to consider the Reconquista of Spain to be equal in importance to retaking the Holy Land. Also a castle actually named “Deus Vult.”
Tim Simon on how Byzantium and Gondor from LotR are connected.
Strangely this would make for some pretty exciting comics. The character interaction between Knighty Knight and Detective Horse would no doubt be memorable.
J. D. Cohen Declares the Short Story dead and begins a murder investigation.
Food, art and music. Food is the easiest but only becomes a concern when the characters don’t have a steady reliable supply of it. Or if they are moving between multiple cultures. Art and music are best left for the slower parts of the story and again would only be noticed if the character is operating outside his usual culture.
A typical day on any internet gaming forum.
Anthony M. On the nature of parody and what makes a good one.
The old maxim is that the best parodies are done out of a love for the source material. Which is why so much of the modern subversive comedy of recent years falls flat.
Where’s my tactical buzzbombs?
The Rocket Robin Hood opening and theme song.
This was a horrible cartoon but damn if that theme song didn’t inspire young boys. Also you do have to respect the sheer pulpiness of the premise.
Well okay when you look at it this way…
Amanda S, Green critiques the internal economics of Star Trek.
Military History Visualized on German Flak Towers in WWII [8 mins]
So basically a form of Nazi castle. These flak towers might also work transferred over to a sci-fi setting as spaceport cities would need to be defended against pirates and Marine raiders.
I case you we’re wondering just how ridiculous Disney Star Wars is.
Cameron Mount goes over the history of The Green Hornet and what made the character popular.
Quick note if you dig around on Youtube it is possible to find the old movie serials. Sometimes even edited together into a single movie.
1933 US Army Cavalry Training Film [10 mins]
A very interesting look at how interwar cavalry units operated. The horse handling procedures are also a great deal more involved than I would have envisioned. Each platoon also has two light machine guns organized into a weapons squad that breaks apart into fireteams to support the rifle platoons. This is logically the only way to do things but actually seeing how it was done is strangely satisfying.
An article covering the flaws in more contemporary vampire stories, while giving a few suggestions.
“The most common complaint I hear about Twilight (other than Kristen Stewart’s acting) is the vampire as a romantic figure. I wholeheartedly agree; casting a vampire character as a romantic figure is akin to putting a mosquito on the cover of People magazine.“
Jim Fear on how Realism destroys Sci-fi, Fantasy and Horror Stories.
These genres are fundamentally based on wonder and fantastic elements. Even Low Fantasy which uses supernatural elements very sparingly needs to sell those elements when they are encountered. Besides if I wanted reality I’d look out the window.
Battletech Lore: Origin of the Battlemech [14 mins]
Strangely topically at the moment. As there does seem to be a BattleTech revival of sorts in the works.
A neat piece of history.
J. D. Cohen Declares the Short Story dead and begins a murder investigation.
“Seriously – those of us following a policy of, “Don’t Give Money To People Who Hate You” are being boxed into ever tighter corners. Can’t watch TV. Can’t go to the movies. Can’t even enjoy vast swathes of tabletop gaming.”
Newest episode of Issac Arthur’s Outward Bound has been released and it discusses a planet mostly discounted in science fiction.
Colonizing Mercury [27 mins]
There’s a couple of interesting ideas thrown around here. Nomadic cities or mobile mining bases (very similar to the Nomad City mining operation ran by Lando Calrissian in Heir to the Empire.)
Mushroom Colonies: Which are interesting from an artistic or architectural stand point.
and then there’s building a planetary scale sterling engine.
The great cosmic joke is that in Canada the colors of the major parties are reversed.
Quick explain this to someone from 2008.
The election of Doug Ford to the Premiership of Canada’s largest province Ontario is a major blow to the Canadian Left. I was expecting Ford to win but I wasn’t expecting him to damn near wipe out the opposition. This a big deal. Soy Minister Justin Trudeau is already behind in the next election. If the Liberals lose any more of their support in Ontario or Quebec the Conservatives are going to be unstoppable.
Stefan Molyneux’s Somewhat Philosophical Take on the Ontario Election [6 Mins]
Rebel Media on How This Election Is A Rebuke To The Media [6 Mins]
People are paying less and less attention to Fake News.
Ghost ranting about the Ontario Election. [9 mins]
Election talk start around the four minute mark. He’s an acquired taste but one hell of a showman. Also did I hear that right? 56% of eligible voters? For a provincial election? That’s a big deal!
This 2019 election is going to be so hilarious.
Let the Great Decucking begin.
Edit: Replaced a lackluster StyxHexenHammer video with a better, more topical one from Rebel Media.
Of Wolves and Men 