Nerdlife 13: Never Tell Me the Odds

Sorry about the delay on this one but I got sucked into a wormhole and spent most of the last couple evening messing around with MegaMek and trying (er… failing) to get the hang of it. That campaign editor is just taunting me at this point. Sadly I’m not that familiar with the Battletech Tabletop rules.

Anyway let’s begin.

How to make Warhammer Adventures NOT suck [11 mins]

Arch Warhammer outlines his modest proposal for hoe to go about writing a children’s story in the Warhammer 40k universe while still staying faithful to established lore.

 

Cody Fernandez on the Punisher, antiheroes and how the character effected him as teenager.

https://www.thecomiccorner.co.uk/blog/the-punisher-and-dehumanization

An excellent take on vigilantes and the contrast between heroes who wear white hat and those who feel they must wear the grey hat.

 

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Edible six pack holders? This is actually a good idea.

https://www.wptv.com/news/region-s-palm-beach-county/delray-beach/delray-beachs-saltwater-brewery-creates-edible-six-pack-holder-that-wont-hurt-marine-animals

 

How the Crusades begin in Spain [22 mins]

The video is a little dry but this might be interesting to anyone who plays Crusader Kings or is interested in medieval history. Of note is how Pope Urban II seemed to consider the Reconquista of Spain to be equal in importance to retaking the Holy Land. Also a castle actually named “Deus Vult.”

 

Tim Simon on how Byzantium and Gondor from LotR are connected.

https://bondwine.com/2010/03/13/gondor-byzantium-and-feudalism/

and yes this was Tolkien’s intention.

 

therevengers.jpg

Strangely this would make for some pretty exciting comics. The character interaction between Knighty Knight and Detective Horse would no doubt by memorable.

 

J. D. Cohen Declares the Short Story dead and begins a murder investigation.

https://wastelandandsky.blogspot.com/2018/06/the-assisted-suicide-of-short-stories.html

One thing I’m going to add it that it has proven to quite difficult to start writing short stories when you’ve grown up not reading them.

 

Mecha Warriors [song]

I just love the little stories this guy comes up with for his songs.

 

A quick note on worldbuilding.

https://gscotthuggins.com/2018/05/31/a-few-thoughts-on-worldbuilding/

Food, art and music. Food is the easiest but only becomes a concern when the characters don’t have a steady reliable supply of it. Or if they are moving between multiple cultures. Art and music are best left for the slower parts of the story and again would only be noticed if the character is operating outside his usual culture.

 

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A typical day on any internet gaming forum.

 

Anthony M. On the nature of parody and what makes a good one.

http://www.superversivesf.com/2018/05/31/what-makes-a-great-parody/

The old maxim is that the best parodies are done out of a love for the source material. Which is why so much of the modern subversive comedy of recent years falls flat.

 

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Where’s my tactical buzzbombs?

 

The Rocket Robin Hood opening and theme song.

 

This was a horrible cartoon but damn if that theme song didn’t inspire young boys. Also you do have to respect the sheer pulpiness of the premise.

 

jedifail.jpg

Well okay when you look at it this way…

 

Amanda S, Green critiques the internal economics of Star Trek.

https://accordingtohoyt.com/2018/05/31/trekonomics-3-wheres-the-money-by-amanda-s-green/

 

Military History Visualized on German Flak Towers in WWII [8 mins]

So basically a form of Nazi castle. These flak towers might also work transferred over to a sci-fi setting as spaceport cities would need to be defended against pirates and Marine raiders.

 

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I case you we’re wondering just how ridiculous Disney Star Wars is.

 

Cameron Mount goes over the history of The Green Hornet and what made the character popular.

https://broadswordsandblasters.com/2018/05/28/pulp-appeal-the-green-hornet/

Quick note if you dig around on Youtube it is possible to find the old movie serials. Sometimes even edited together into a single movie.

 

1933 US Army Cavalry Training Film [10 mins]

A very interesting look at how interwar cavalry units operated. The horse handling procedures are also a great deal more involved than I would have envisioned. Each platoon also has two light machine guns organized into a weapons squad that breaks apart into fireteams to support the rifle platoons. This is logically the only way to do things but actually seeing how it was done is strangely satisfying.

 

An article covering the flaws in more contemporary vampire stories, while giving a few suggestions.

https://urban-fantasy.com/2018/05/30/vampires-suck/

“The most common complaint I hear about Twilight (other than Kristen Stewart’s acting) is the vampire as a romantic figure. I wholeheartedly agree; casting a vampire character as a romantic figure is akin to putting a mosquito on the cover of People magazine.“

 

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Jim Fear on how Realism destroys Sci-fi, Fantasy and Horror Stories.

https://jimfear138.blogspot.com/2018/06/against-realism.html

These genres are fundamentally based on wonder and fantastic elements. Even Low Fantasy which uses supernatural elements very sparingly needs to sell those elements when they are encountered. Besides if I wanted reality I’d look out the window.

 

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Battletech Lore: Origin of the Battlemech [14 mins]

Strangely topically at the moment. As there does seem to be a BattleTech revival of sorts in the works.

 

Hawaiidollars.jpg

A neat piece of history.

 

 

 

 

 

J. D. Cohen Declares the Short Story dead and begins a murder investigation.

https://wastelandandsky.blogspot.com/2018/06/the-assisted-suicide-of-short-stories.html

One thing I’m going to add it that it has proven to quite difficult to start writing short stories when you’ve grown up not reading them.

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Jon Mollison on how the new wave of Independent Crowd-funded comics are rekindling his love for the medium.

http://jonmollison.com/2018/06/03/when-did-i-become-a-comic-book-fan/

Seriously – those of us following a policy of, “Don’t Give Money To People Who Hate You” are being boxed into ever tighter corners. Can’t watch TV. Can’t go to the movies. Can’t even enjoy vast swathes of tabletop gaming.”

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— Wolfman out—

The womp rats died for nothing,

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Nerdlife 13: Never Tell Me the Odds

Nerdlife Twelve: Ride The Chaos

Sort of rushing this one but I’m in the mood and there’s enough happening in geek circles to keep the energy levels up. Since this should be going out on Memorial day I’ll start with Vietnam War clip.

‘Tunnel rats’ Vietnam War (1967) army report [3 mins]

Balls; huge brass ones. The only thing more dangerous than urban warfare is fighting underground. Yet there are always those who will rise to the occasion.

 

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An interview on the topic of females warriors on the main Baen website.

http://www.baen.com/femalewarrior

I know that this is a very sore topic; especially with the nonsense going on with Battlefield V right now. Still a decent read. Women in a combat role is a sign of a broken society or of absolute military desperation. Truth is both scenarios make for pretty dramatic and interesting storytelling.

 

Zaklog reads The One Black Stain by Robert E Howard [5 mins]

Solomon Kane is always a win.

 

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I wonder how the Vinland story would work redone in science fiction setting?

 

Catholic Horror Vampire Detective author Declan Finn rips into West Coast Avengers and highlights the many points of failure.

http://www.declanfinn.com/2018/05/marvel-full-of-fail.html

 

Geeky Bugle talks about the 2011 Thundercats reboot. [13 mins]

He makes the pitch that the 2011 series was clearly written by someone who had played DnD and in effect the show is an old school tabletop campaign. This is an excellent review especially in the wake of the incoming ‘Tumblrcats Meow’ knockoff being sent out to soy down your children and crush their dreams and spirits.

 

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Quick! Explain ComicsGate in one picture!

 

And speaking of soy? Well at least we have a treatment for that.

Thundercats meets metal.

His Ghostbusters theme cover is also excellent

 

An older article from Trever Bierschbach from Frags and Beer discussing one of the great flaws in SJW writing. If special snowflakes characters can never have anything bad happen to them there is no way for an audience to get invested or for any real tension to be built up.

http://fragsandbeer.com/creating-untouchable-characters-will-kill-diversity/

 

Yes look it’s more Leo. I don’t really need a reason.

Micheal Jackson songs really do translate very well into metals covers.

 

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And yes somebody is trying to send me a hint.

 

“Mysterious Wandering Monk” and sci-fi author Brian Niemeier righteously gloats about the failure of Solo.

http://www.brianniemeier.com/2018/05/a-day-long-remembered.html

Yes he called it.

 

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A random name generator that covers a very wide selection of things, places, settings and most importantly real world cultures. This helps a lot when you’re trying to come up with names for Space Boer mercenaries. Very useful website.

https://www.fantasynamegenerators.com/

 

Spike Valentine of Bleeding Fool gives an in depth review of Solo

http://www.bleedingfool.com/sjw/spike-reviews-solo-a-star-wars-story-spoilers/

Seriously, if you edit out the Han Solo character from this flick, it would be a pretty solid movie! You know how painful that is to say about one of your favorite characters of all time, certainly your favorite Star Wars character, regarding his own fricking film!?”

He also covers some of the rumours going around how Solo might have orignaially been an anti-SJW movie under the original directors (who were fired suddenly with a lot a drama.)

This would also explain why Disney Shills (including actual studio personnel) reacted so strongly to Ethan Van Sciver’s Soylo: A Soy Wars Soyry campaign.

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Possible happenings in the OSR circles… or probably just the usual bugmen spazzing out over imaginary Trump-Hitler death robots.

https://therpgpundit.blogspot.com/2018/05/is-there-alt-right-influence-on-osr-or.html

 

—Wolfman Out—

Still rocking in the memory of the Free World.

takeashotforharambe

Nerdlife Twelve: Ride The Chaos

Can’t Sleep Thinking About Weird Stuff

rabbitarmy.jpg

Look closely at the above picture. It’s a rabbit army on a crusade.

But wait? The litter is being carried by a pair of dogs.

These dogs are clearly a separate race.

Are they slaves? Prisoners? Or merely allies serving in the rabbit crusade army?

Is there a joint Rabbitperson-Dogman Kingdom?

and who are they crusading against?

So many questions…

Can’t Sleep Thinking About Weird Stuff

The Premise

It was a century after the final cataclysm of the Third Mythological War.

The Gods lie sleeping, exhausted from their battles.

Demons and demigods released from their chains run amok, bringing terror and despair to mortal men.

The Elves have fled to their hidden sanctuaries. To bide their time and replenish their numbers. They will take no part in the struggles of this age.

The Dwarves have returned to the mountains seeking to reclaim their ancient fortresses from the terrors of the Deep.

It is an age of monsters and giants.

An age of tyrants and dark magic.

An age where evil stands unopposed and reigns from atop the ruins of a world.

Yet into this world rides one without a past, without a future, only a mission.

The world cries out for justice.

Talidor the Axe shall answer.

Be he God or Man?

The Premise

A Story Fragment

Had an unexpectedly busy last few days so I’m posting this in lieu of actual content… because brain not work too well right now.

 

Illegal Alien (Can’t remember why I titled it that)

“Worse disguise ever,” the figure in the full body suit burka sulked.

Markus had to admit she had a point. Walking through the Nebraska state fair dressed as a Arab couple two days after a major terrorist attack was turning out to have been a less than ideal choice, “I didn’t have to time to rig a magical disguise and if any of these people saw a non-human there would be a massive freak out.”

Zunni whined some more on sheer principle her hands almost shaking in frustration as they walked past a pulled pork BBQ kiosk with its very delicious smelling wares. It took every ounce of Markus self-discipline not to crack up laughing. Danburi elves were rather enthusiastic meat eaters whenever they got the chance to indulge their carnivorous instincts and pork in all its glorious multitude of forms was at top of their favorite things to eat. Probably because as subterranean dwellers they so rarely got the opportunity to eat mundane surface living livestock. The other possibility was that pork was the closest they could get to eating human flesh without breaking their religious codes. Not something that was discussed in polite company, mind you. Zunni however firmly insisted that she was a people person not a people-eating person.

“I’ll get you a ham when we get to the safehouse,” Markus promised as if to a small child. Zunni really didn’t seem to understand just how much danger the two of them were in. Especially since they couldn’t just start hurling fireballs around without killing and injuring dozens if not hundreds of innocents. “In the meantime just keep quiet unless you want to wind up locked up in Area 51.”

“Aww… I’m missing all the fun,” Zunni pouted. “and the bacon. Especially the bacon. Americans put bacon on everything.”

So this wasn’t Zunni’s first visit to Earth… interesting. Markus filed that thought away for later. The Order never told its field agents anything more than they absolutely needed to know. To be honest he really didn’t know that much about his companion only that it had taken a lot of horse trading and frantic diplomacy to convince her to get involved. What ever this current crisis was, it was serious enough that the Order was calling in a lot of favors.

 

A Story Fragment

Three Quick Videos

Just a quick Youtube selection since I needed to step back a little from current events. Also I’m sure some of you are getting a little sick of the tinfoily stuff.

 

Skallagrim shows off a very nasty piece of #PulpRev worthy kit. [8 mins]

Kind of gives you a warm fuzzy feeling inside doesn’t it?

Note that this isn’t really a battlefield weapon as it is a little too heavy and overbuilt. This is a gladiator weapon, most likely a crowd favorite. Or perhaps the weapon of a wandering barbarian champion? Does the hero carry a weapon like this? Or is this the tool of a black hooded adversary?

 

Weaponized Nerdrage on how China did not like the newest Star Wars. [12 min]

He makes a lot of good points here. Also you’re gonna want to stick around for the anti-Michael Bay rant around the ten minute mark.

 

I honestly didn’t know Brian Blessed was Boss Nass [7 mins]

I always made sure that my noises never interfered with my dialogue because I had a lot of plot…”

The video ends with Brian Blessed reading lines from Braveheart in his Boss Nass voice.

Three Quick Videos

When The Going Gets Weird. The Weird Get Going.

The sidhe mystic trembled as she came out of her meditative trance, “Fedoras,” she gasped her eyes wide with otherworldly terror. The two men standing in front of her both took instinctively took a step back as the room shook slightly.

“What? A vision?” Drake Decker, paranormal investigator asked. “Tell me, what did you see?”

“Fedoras… many fedoras! All being tipped together,” the mystic pronounced. “Something is coming!”

Drake went to ask a followup question but before he could the sidhe tore off her clothes and run off screaming into the night. “Hmm,” he pondered. “Probably not a good sign.”

“Most definitely not a good sign,” Dave the fabulously gay wizard added. “Anything that can scare Kylie like that is going to be err… troublesome.”

“So much for my vacation,” Drake lamented. “We need to at least hold the fort down until back up arrives.”

“What about Kylie?” The wizard asked motioning to the open door. “We don’t need her scaring the normies.”

“She’ll be fine,” Drake replied. “Nigh invulnerable fairie thot superstar.”

“You’re not worried about a naked elf chick running down the street screaming about negative vibrations in the cosmic resonance?”

“It’s Vancouver, no one will notice anything out of the ordinary.” Drake shrugged. It was one of the few advantages to working out of Canada’s Left Coast.

“So what now?” Dave asked.

There was a tense silent moment while Drake reviewed his options. “If it’s not an Elder God we can handle it, just have to call in a few favors that’s all.”

“You mean more favors,” The wizard added. Just getting a sidhe, any sidhe involved was going to cost the Order something down the line.

“We’ll burn that bridge when we get to it.” Drake muttered. “First things first, we need to stake out that anime fan convention you were talking about earlier.”

“Right big concentration of virgins,” Dave nodded. “Barely any security. At most a wand-mage or two packing heat.”

“Just what a fledgling goddess cult needs.” Drake said. “But that’s a little too obvious. Anything else going this weekend that might fit the bill?”

The wizard eyes briefly went white as he refreshed his memory. “The Association For the Appreciation of Monstergirls is holding a meeting.”

“Even bigger dorks, older too so their blood would be exceptionally potent.” Drake said swiftly.

“One catch I don’t think any of those guys are virgins,” Dave countered.

“Really?” Drake retorted.

“Because there’s only really one way to properly appreciate a monstergirl,” Dave answered with a smirk.

Drake didn’t want to think about it. “Okay we’ll stick to the anime convention. It’s a place to start.”

When The Going Gets Weird. The Weird Get Going.