Flat Earth: Seriously I Don’t Get It

So what exactly are the Flat Earth arguments? Is there a special strain of pipeweed that I need to smoke into order to find the magic shimmering doorways to wisdom and knowledge?

At least the Moon Landing Conspiracy made at least some sense. Hell even Reptilian Theory works as a perfect metaphor for explaining the actions of the world leadership caste.

Flat Earth Theory doesn’t even make perfect nonsense but it does lead to a lot of great memes.

flatearthcat.jpg

Thus begin the legend of Fluffy the Cosmic Terror Beast.

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Ok… not that this makes sense. However it would make for a great RPG setting.

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Still my favorite.

oronebigufo

So listen either the Earth is flat… that is one BIG alien mothership and we are ALL getting probed.

imgesofearth

There’s probably some camera geek who can explain this but nobody has time to listen to a four hour lecture on optics.

So that’s all for today.

And yes Discworld is awesome.

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Flat Earth: Seriously I Don’t Get It

Random Encounter

I’m probably going to regret posting this but… while I’m still completely hopeless when it comes to most human interaction I seem to have shut off enough of my anti-game to get myself in the occasional bit of trouble.

Note that the following takes place in about a thirty to forty second chance meeting.

 

Observation

Cute, high energy blonde chick (1)

Pierced nose but no obvious tattoos

Pushing up against the 2SD comm barrier but thankfully not over it. (2)

Very slender.

Slightly crazy puppy dog eyes.

Somewhat jailbait-y (3)

Nicotine stains on fingers

 

Orientation

Much cuter than most women I draw the attention of.

The nicotine stains are a HUGE warning sign when combined with how young she is. (4)

I’m completely unequipped to handle any sort of crazy bitch drama. (5)

 

Decision

The white race is to be saved by other means.

but there’s no reason to be an asshole, here.

 

Action

Maintain composure.

Flirt slightly to be polite.

DO NOT PURSUE. (6)

 

And because you shitlords are going to ask.

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Going to say Slavic but Germanic is also a possibility. Again we met very briefly and I didn’t have a chart handy.

 

End Notes:

1: Not a huge fan of blondes but they can be upgraded into perky redheads with a $2 redbull and a $10 box of hairdye. Both items are readily available at any Walmart.

2: This would put her in the 95-100 IQ range. Completely average and unremarkable but trust me I notice when I hit the wall. I think 105-110 would be ideal for me but most such women are pretty arrogant.

3: Guessing she’s about 22 but I’m bad enough at this sort of thing that I occasionally get sternly worded letters from Chris Hansen.

4: A lot of mental patients self medicate with tobacco (reduces stress and appetite.) Combine that with the vibe I got off of her and all sorts of alarms went off.

5: Know thyself. Know thy enemy. I need a sane five, not a crazy seven.

6: Made it a point not to burn any bridges since I live a small enough town that I’m likely to meet this woman again. There’s also the chance my first impression of her could be completely wrong. Still not gonna bite, too many warning signs.

7: Also there’s this. https://infogalactic.com/info/Rusalka but that’s probably going too far.

 

 

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