Hey Media! Get Some!

Black Sails by Grand Magus

Music to set the mood and my personal nomination for the Alt-Right Anthem.

Dear Establishment Media, you are fucked. Not only that you are so completely fucked that even the full length and breadth of the English language does not allow me to properly convey the extent of how exactly fucked you are.

For you see the entire Liberal Establishment is coming down. What will be the end of it? Will the Globalist Agenda die by the Red Hat? Or by the Black Sails? Or by something else entirely? Who knows? the Gods of Metal say nothing. Only the Doom is certain; of that the omens are clear.

As the clickbait hacks and two bit grifters of the media began their assault upon the AltRight in a desperate bid to stop the collapse of Zombie Clinton’s presidential campaign. Know this one thing; there is nothing you can do to us that the Elders of the Tribes have not seen before.

Why do the young men of the West flock to our cause? Is it because you offer them nothing? In part but consider this….

You the modern journalist inevitably write down to your audience. You sneer at them from the top of your illusionary tower of intellectually superiority. Your fragile ego demands that you must put yourself above your audience, above the common plebs in order for you to shower down your yellow drips of wisdom, your progressive enlightenment upon them. Your hatred for your readers is mandatory; a natural result of this approach taken more or across the board throughout the mainstream media.

Now I of this small (but not terribly humble blog) find myself taking the complete opposite approach. I write up to my audience Why? I was baffled myself at first but I think I’ve figured it out. One aspect of the Alt-Right that you Marxist clods could never understand is that a core aspect threaded through all branches of the philosophy are the Cult of Self-Improvement and Self-Education. Perhaps I write up because I seek the counsel and companionship of stronger, more intelligent, wiser men? Either way I respect my readers and make it clear that I do so.

A modern progressive blogger would desperately avoid such ‘more equal’ men at all costs as Gamma males depend too much on their superior intelligence in order to maintain their self-esteem. They tremble at the thought of being proven wrong; how dare a commenter prove them a complete idiot on their pet cause. Ban all dissent!!! Even if they are a long time loyal reader! The Secret King who rules these lands CAN NEVER BE WRONG!!! We must protect the Holy Narrative at all costs! One by one readers and viewers grow tired of this behaviour and begin to look for alternatives. If they find one they will abandon you. Maybe they will find me? Only the Gods of Metal know.

Now I of course am but an insignificant gnat in the eye compared the establishment media but there are thousands of men like me and more pulling their boots on and getting to work everyday.

Sooner or later we will eat you smug hipster dipshits alive.

and what are you going to do? Call me Hitler?

Edgy as fuck bro! EDGY AS FUCK!


Hitler Cat is cute adorable and wants to remind #AltFurry to make sure that all the helicopters are refuelled and given extra careful pre-flight checks. We’ll be needing them soon.

You see we of the Alt-Right are the edgy rebels you always wanted to be and you’re just a tool of the Establishment terrified to think your own thoughts, much less to say them.

Also typical of the Leftist Rabble you’re so obsessed with the Nazis that you completely ignore the other 2500 years of German history. Have you heard of the Teutoburg Forest? No? Pity because that’s where your unholy parody of a Roman Empire is headed.

Let’s try to put this in proper perspective.

This is you. (Mid-tier blogger whose name I can’t be arsed to remember)


This is the Alt-Right


(Photograph courtesy of Nigel Farage)

Normally I would feel pity for you. I am after all just a warm, soft fuzzy libertarian, barely part of the Alt-Right but you see I once flew the White Flag of surrender. Sadly that flag raised in earnest was dishonored so with trembling hands I took it down and replaced it with the Black Flag. So go ahead and scream you cretins, your suffering is but music to my ears.

Understand I’m not the cause of your doom, only the Herald of it. For doom is upon you oh great Secret Kings and I shall be just one of the jesters that will mock you as you fall.

Righteous talons shall tear you asunder and then offer your small, black but still beating hearts to the Goddess Europa. The West shall rise again, new crops will be sown and we shall use the ashes of your Narrative as fertilizer.

So great will be your fall from the ivory towers of The Cathedral that when your sorry ass hits the ground you’ll just keep right on going all the way into the firey depths of Hell. Don’t worry Satan is expecting you; I sent him an email explaining everything.

and when you get to Hell be sure to tell the doorman that “Harambe sent you.”

Also… I do hope that you’ll remember this one asshole dressed like a Viking, who was pointing and laughing at you the whole way down.


—Wolfman out.

This has been a message from the Alt-Right Council for Public Relations.

Hey Media! Get Some!

One thought on “Hey Media! Get Some!

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